A Statement About the Harry Potter

Now there are two ways to review this movie: one is in comparison to the book, the other is on its own as a film, independent of anything except the films that have come before it.

Two guesses as to where Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince fails miserably as a movie. Go on, guess. I'll wait.

OK, maybe I won't. So here's the deal. As a film, HPATHBP (hell, even the abbreviation is long) is... fine. Just fine. It certainly has its moments of humor and action and suspense (although if you've read the books, not really) but it's long and the acting isn't always stellar (Hi Daniel Radcliffe. You're really cute, and you're trying. I get it. Try harder, k?), the special effects are great, the story is long and complicated.

Trying really hard to separate from the book for a moment, I have to say that I would be very, very dissatisfied with these films as a casual observer. In fact, I'm pretty sure I would find them pointless and superficial. There are too many things going on that I wouldn't understand, too many peripheral characters who show up for no discernable reason, and too many main characters suffering as a result of trying to stuff 700-odd pages into a very, very long (but not quite long enough) movie.

So it's just fine. No jumping up and down, no LOTR comparisons, no waxing poetic about how this is changing the face of cinema.

And now on to the rant (See? You thought the rant already occurred. Not so.) Before I start, I want to say that I get it. As readers, we all have different interpretations of what the Potterverse is supposed to look like, and there is just so much of it. Honestly, how could they possibly do it justice, nevermind live up to expectations?

But even letting go of that, there are some creative choices that continue to befuddle me even three days after screening the film. Dumbledore discovers Harry at Surbiton station in the film. Really? Does he really? Because there's a pretty frakking important point to be made about Harry's safety and the reason he has to go home to Privet Drive every summer. The whole point is that he can't just go wandering around. And you know what? When the Dursleys kick him out at the beginning of THBP (much better) book, Dumbledore shows up to lay the smackdown for putting Harry's life at risk.

Which, by the way, also sets up the electric opening sequence in The Deathly Hallows in which Harry has to be removed from the house at midnight on his 18th birthday and Hedwig... Nevermind. I can't even get in to it.

Another thing that is sticking out (significantly) is the placement of Harry during the tower scene. Not going to get all spoilery, but if you know what I'm talking about, you know what I'm talking out. Great pains are taken (and time is wasted!) at the beginning of the film to show how effective it is to disable Harry by paralyzing him with Petrificus Totalus and then covering him with the invisibility cloak. No one can see him! He can't move! How effective!

To then send Harry below in the tower sequence and give him complete free will as to whether or not to interfere kind of makes him a coward. Not to mention the complete lack of proper view of the proceedings, and the interference of Snape? Uh... how ambiguous?

No funeral. No Weasley is our king. No time to see Harry and Ginny be happy for a little while. Because we all know it doesn't last long. No reason for Fenrir Greyback to show up at all (Except, apparently, to burn down The Burrow. What. The. Frak.)

A word about the next film: They've gone and split it in two, which is vaguely comforting (more time to delve more deeply into things! Hooray!) but the question still lingers as to whether or not it's a great idea. Show me the natural pause point in TDH, and I'll write a favorable review of New Moon. Deal?

(I could get into a discussion about how Twilight-ers will use this as evidence that Twilight is "better," while they completely dismiss the fact that the reason those books translate so well into films is that there's nothing to them, but I don't want to bore you)

OK, I'm done now. Happy?

A Statement About I Could Never Be Your Woman

Once upon a time Amy Heckerling, genius director of Fast Times At Ridgemont High and Clueless, wrote and directed a movie called I Could Never Be Your Woman. Something terrible happened. And then the movie went straight to DVD. And then no one watched it, ever.

Well, except me this weekend.

It stars Michelle Pfeiffer and Paul Rudd (as well as a host of Clueless-related cameos) as an aging TV producer and the new star she's discovered on the set of her smash teen show. Hilarity and antics ensue as she battles the insecurities that come with aging and aging in Hollywood. Inside H-wood jokes abound (her daughter gets in a fight in school because someone made fun of her mother's show's ratings; her ex-husband is "scripting" a reality show...?). The plot is slightly less than coherent (the romance doesn't take hold enough to be the central plot, but if it's not, I don't know what is) and some of it is slightly askew (on what planet are we to believe that Jon Lovitz and Michelle Pfeiffer were ever married?), but the overall charm is undeniable.

While taking place in Beverly Hills, it is very obvious that the shooting took place in the UK, as several minor British stars pop up in the strangest places (hello, Graham Norton! And yes, that is Mackenzie Crook perfecting his Amerrrrrican accent). This adds to the overall feeling of disconnect I had throughout the film. I was enjoying it, but I wasn't involved and it felt very flat.

Absolute hands-down, hats off, etc., to Pfeiffer herself and Saoirse Ronan who plays her daughter (another random Brit in the mix). Their chemistry is palpable, and Ronan adds almost every laugh-out-loud moment in the film-- most especially her teen-pop parodies, including Britney's Not That Talented.

Conclusion? I Could Never Be Your Woman went straight to DVD due to studio and money issues, not because of quality per se. However, it probably would not have done well in the theaters, and the direct-to DVD buyers' slightly lowered expectations can only do this film good. Rent it from the library. Go on. I know a really cool one that has it in their catalog.

A Statement About the Desert Island Movies

In the previous post, I mentioned the Office watching I was doing with my grandmother, which very reasonably leads to today's post.

The other night we were watching the Fire episode, in which Ryan inadvertently causes the evacuation of the office when he burns his cheese pita. In his continuing display of Better Leadership Than Michael, Jim leads his coworkers in a rousing series of "Who Would You Do," "Desert Island," and a third game I'm not sure they actually get around to playing.

So last night at the dinner table, my grandmother initiated Desert Island Movies, which later turned into Desert Island TV series. Here are the movies:

NANKIPOO'S PICKS-
The Wizard of Oz
Gone with the Wind
African Queen
Roman Holiday
To Catch a Thief

BITSY'S PICKS-
The Incredibles
His Girl Friday
Pirates of the Caribbean at World's End
Gosford Park
Meet Me in St. Louis

It should also be known that should the Island gods allow a sixth "bonus" film, NP would pick Love, Actually.

A word about my choices (well, one choice specifically). Pirates of the Caribbean is a risky pick, not a particularly good movie, and in fact is fairly exhausting to watch. I knew there needed to be a place on my list for an epically long film (as is on NP's, see: GWTW), and the plain truth is that I could watch Pirates at World's End anytime, anywhere. I'm not proud of it, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.

And now for the TV:

NANKIPOO'S PICKS-
MASH
MacGyver
Carol Burnett
Lost
The Best of Johnny Carson

BITSY'S PICKS-
Felicity
Alias
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Arrested Development
The Office (American)

Here there is a more obvious disparity between the generations, although Lost is certainly something I would have considered myself (it would be my "bonus sixth" probably, if only because it can be watched over and over without inducing boredom).

Now it's your turn! Come up with your five of each and post them (or not). It never hurts to be prepared for the Desert Island. In the immortal words of Sam Lewis, "you never know."